It's a common mistake - sticking in excess words which aren't needed. Recently, at a writer's conference, an editor had this
to say, “the readers at publishing houses will have a check list of common errors. If the author goes over their limit (whatever it
may be), then the manuscript will get a reject.
Using “as” and “that” inappropriately or too often, were the two main ones she mentioned. I'm not
talking about a sentence such as “Do not do that again.” “That” is misused as in, “Serena knew that Rhamus
was sad.” The sentence still makes sense without the “that” and actually is stronger.
Also, don't use “very”, and don't overuse “suddenly”. You can substitute “unexpectedly,
abruptly, in a flash”, or “in a wink”.
The easiest way to check for these mistakes in you writing, is to use the “find” feature on your computer.
© 2001 by Myra Nour